


Cruel, Cruel World I'm Gone

by Salazar101



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Blood, Choking, M/M, Monster Reaper | Gabriel Reyes, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:27:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21757093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Salazar101/pseuds/Salazar101
Summary: Jack Morrison is haunted by the memories of his ex-lover-turned-enemy Gabriel Reyes.  However, his haunting abruptly turns much more tangible, and much more dangerous, as he returns home to Bloomington.
Relationships: Reaper | Gabriel Reyes/Soldier: 76 | Jack Morrison
Comments: 15
Kudos: 30
Collections: Reaper76 Free For All Secret Santa 2019





	Cruel, Cruel World I'm Gone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RavenSalander](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenSalander/gifts).

> I hope my secret santa enjoys their fic! Title taken from [Cruel World](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8hxPFWnkWo)

Cairo was a wreck of its former glory. It was just a stop on his journey to dismantle Talon, but Jack had to admit that there was something about the ruined city that called to him. A ruined man in a ruined city. They were both shells of themselves. He walked cautiously down an alley, exhausted and trying to make his way to a nearby safehouse. Ana was in a different safehouse tonight; they had both agreed to lay low and take some of the heat off them.

Jack’s head snapped up as he heard something scuff on the roof above him, moving on instinct he ran out of the alley. He turned to look up at the rooftops. Nothing. Perhaps it had just been a bird or rat. Either way, he wasn’t going to hang around here; he was already on high alert.

He had good reason to be. Hunted by his ex-lover, knowing that at any moment Reaper could melt out of the darkness like blood seeping out from under a door and with one mighty roar of his Hellfire shotguns it would be over for him. He jogged further into the twisting, ruined neighborhood of Cairo. This neighborhood had never recovered from the Omnic War, the buildings were never repaired; so they were falling into each other.

Jack slowed down once he thought no one could have followed him and slipped into a destroyed building, crawling through the entrance and then standing up in what had once been someone’s living room. All their things were still scattered about, though mostly decayed. More importantly, there was a ratty old bed roll and a cache he’d left here a few years ago.

This was as safe as a place could be for him. Only one way in or out. Jack sat down heavily and sighed, so exhausted he barely managed to pull a nutritional bar from the cache. He pulled his mask off to eat it, the entire bare completely tasteless. He wasn’t sure he could taste even the finest of steaks right now. It would all turn to ash in his mouth.

Jack had one job; it consumed him: destroy the termites that had hollowed out Overwatch and to  _ kill _ Reaper, the man he’d once loved with all his heart. Was Gabriel Reyes actually under that mask? Jack hadn’t seen, and Ana refused to speak about what she’d seen beyond mentioning that Gabriel was not the man they once knew.

He was pulled from his thoughts as he heard  _ something _ move outside. Jack clipped his mask back on and grabbed his rifle, getting one knee under him so he could lunge at whoever was sneaking in here. Could just be a desperate person... could be something, or someone, more ominous.

Jack was tense as the seconds ticked by into minutes, but nothing happened. Was he hearing things? Was he going crazy? Jack took a deep breath and stood up; how was he supposed to sleep here now? He had to sleep  _ somewhere _ . Should he listen to his growing paranoia and just end up even more exhausted than he already was? No... no he had to listen to sense. Jack slowly lowered himself back to the bedroll, keeping his gun in his hand and his mask on as he shut his eyes. Despite his paranoia, he fell asleep almost as soon as he closed his eyes.

_ “Oh Jaaackie!” _

_ Jack’s shoulders hunched up as he heard that sing-songy, mocking voice coming up behind him. Don’t rise to the bait, don’t--he turned around with a painfully fake smile, “Hey, Reyes, what’s up?” _

_ Gabriel Reyes got right into his face, so close that their noses almost brushed and their chests were pressed together, his teeth were bared in a grin more akin to a rabid dog than the smile of a friend. “You tripped me on the field today,” Reyes said through his grit teeth, lips still pulled back in a furious smile.  _

_ “I won that race fair and square,” Jack said, refusing to be intimidated, “it’s not my fault you’re slow as shit with two left feet.” _

_ “Listen here you corn-fed piece of shi-” _

_ “Reyes, Morrison!” _

_ Both of them snapped to attention, arms folded behind their backs. Jack stared at a point just above the Sgt. Wiley’s shoulder.  _

_ “Are you two fighting?” Sgt Wiley barked. _

_ “Sir, no sir!” Jack said in tandem with Reyes. _

_ “That’s what I thought,” Wiley said through narrowed eyes. He walked past them and Jack didn’t relax until he was around the corner. He was about to just walk away when Reyes grabbed him by the arm and slammed him against the wall. _

_ “You. Me. Rematch. Tonight, after hours,” Reyes growled in his face. _

_ Jack shoved him away, he wasn’t a competitive person, but Reyes was making it  _ personal _ . “You trying to get better at losing by doing it over and over again?” Jack taunted, enjoying how Reyes’ lips pursed and his bushy eyebrows dipped into a scowl. _

_ “You going to be there or not, Morrison?” _

_ “Oh, I’ll be there,” Jack shoved past Reyes and walked backwards to shoot him a double bird salute before he turned the corner. _

_ Why was his heart beating so fast? It was pounding in his chest like a drum, his breath tight. It was like... he couldn’t draw in any breath at all. Jack sagged against the wall and pressed his hand over his throat as he wheezed. He tried to call out for Reyes. _

_ “R-... G...” Jack choked, struggling for each breath. _

_ Something was wrong. It wasn’t like this.  _

_ Reyes. Gabriel. Came around the corner in his Blackwatch uniform. Jack reached out to him, fingers curling in the front of his armor as he sagged and wheezed for breath. _

_ “Oh Jack,” Gabriel whispered against his lips as he backed him against the wall and pinned him there with his body, thigh sliding between Jack’s legs. “You’re so beautiful in blue. Blue coat, blue eyes...” Gabriel leaned in and gave Jack the barest whisper of a kiss. “Blue lips.” _

Jack jerked awake, gasping and coughing for breath, rolling onto his side as he felt bile rushing up his sore throat. He yanked the mask off just before throwing up what little he’d managed to eat earlier. He spat out some acid and reached up to feel around his throat. It  _ hurt _ , but no one was in here with him. Jack quickly wiped his lips and put the mask back on, glancing around the darkness and stumbling to his feet. Nothing had been disturbed. 

He grabbed his gun and wriggled out from the safe house, unsure of how much he’d even managed to sleep. The sun was just starting to rise as he made a run for it, not sure where he was going.

_ Oh Jaaackieee _

No no no no, only one man called him Jackie! The darkness was calling out to him in a dead man’s voice. Jack ran until he was miles away from that neighborhood and the sun had burned away all the grasping shadows. In the light of day his fear seemed so stupid. Jack dipped into a bathroom at a bar and locked the door behind him. His throat still hurt, a deep, radiating ache.

He stared at his reflection in the cracked mirror as he pulled off the mask and then lowered the high neck of his shirt. Jack felt a fresh wave of sick fear as he noticed the vibrant bruise that wrapped completely around his throat. What was worse was that it didn’t look like bruises caused by hands around a throat, Jack had been strangled enough times to know intimately the shape fingers left around a neck. No...this was like a rope had been wrapped around his throat and tightened.

He pushed the neck back up and got his mask on, grabbed his gun and ran out the back of the bar so no one paid him any attention. Was it possible that he’d put this bruise on himself? Was that more or less likely than  _ something _ being in that safehouse with him without waking him up?

Jack checked the rendezvous point and found a note left by Ana.

_ Going on vacation, see you at home _ .

Jack pulled out a lighter and the little note went up in flames, burning down to his gloves where it fluttered out and he dropped the tiny scrap of paper left. It was time to go home, then. It was for the best that he got out of Cairo; it was messing with him.

Travel overseas was always a difficult prospect when you were a wanted vigilante, but Jack had gotten pretty good at it in the last several years. He’d jumped from Mexico to Europe a few times, and taken trains and planes from Europe to Egypt. It was all about greasing the right palms so he could skip scanners. Money could make him just another old man traveling back to America from Egypt after a vacation. Not that many people were taking their vacations in Egypt these days, not since before the first Omnic Crisis.

Jack didn’t have any of his gear on; it was packed into his carry on bag. He was hiding his face with a ball cap and sunglasses, wearing his compression turtleneck under a comfortable hoodie he’d bought in the terminal and had a picture of the pyramids on it. All his scars and bruises hidden, he was nothing more than some tired guy leaning up against the window to nap as the plane started to fly.

The plane was sparsely populated, Jack getting an entire section to himself. There was a family sitting a few rows behind him, two businessmen sitting a few rows ahead. A couple was speaking under their breath in Arabic just behind the family. Jack blinked heavily, he was  _ so tired _ . Nothing could reach him on the plane, he was  _ safe _ here. So he let his eyes slip shut and fell back asleep.

_ “We’re going to get caught.” _

_ “Not if you be quiet.” _

_ Jack was  _ trying _ to be quiet, but it was hard when Gabriel was grinding a thigh up between his legs and kissing him breathless. They were out in the hallway in the middle of the night. Anyone could sleepily stumble out of their room and see them making out like a pair of horny teenagers. He wasn’t even quite sure how it had come to this, but days of competition had led to a wrestling match alone in the gym that had then devolved into a session of furious grinding and kissing. _

_ They’d been sneaking around ever since. _

_ “Maybe I should gag you,” Gabriel whispered between kisses. Jack shivered at the suggestion, and Gabriel’s eyes lit up with delight. “Oh, you like that, do you, Jackie?” _

_ Jack choked on a groan as he rode Gabriel’s thigh, greedy for friction. His cock was rock hard in his sweats, the front damp with precum. He knew it wouldn’t take much more to get him to come. Gabriel’s fingers traced up his throat and then over his bottom lip, getting between them as they continued to kiss. Jack’s next moan was muffled as Gabriel’s fingers pushed between his lips and pressed down on his tongue. _

_ “Suck on ‘em,” Gabriel breathed hungrily, his own cock was pressed against Jack’s leg, he could feel it hot and throbbing even through their clothing. _

_ Jack closed his lips around Gabriel’s fingers and sucked like they were his cock, bobbing his head. He watched Gabriel’s face from under his lashes, breathing heavily through his nose. Gabriel’s fingers were big and calloused as they rubbed over his tongue, and with every bob of his head it seemed like they were getting  _ longer _ . Jack tried to pull back for a breath but there was nowhere to go, his head was against the wall. Gabriel’s eyes had gone black, his teeth bared in that rabid-animal grin. _

_ Jack whimpered and tried to twist away but his chin was grabbed in a painfully tight grip. _

_ “You’re going to take it, Jackie,” Gabriel whispered, his voice was deeper and darker, smoke curling out from between his lips. His fingers were sliding down Jack’s throat and he choked and struggled to get free. His throat fluttered around his fingers as they shoved deeper and deeper into him, and tears dripped from his eyes, fear and pain mingling together as Gabriel grinned at him. His lips split so Jack could see his perfectly white teeth all the way to the back of his jaw.  _

_ Too many teeth. Too sharp. Gabriel opened his mouth like a dog baring its fangs and Jack tried to scream but nothing could get past the fingers wiggling down his throat. He shoved with all his strength-- _

\--and slammed his head into the roof of the plane, letting out a strangled scream, coughing and gasping for breath before stumbling over himself to get out into the aisle. 

“Sir! Sir, please sit down!”

“Gabe!” Jack gasped and wheezed as he held his throat, swallowed and felt phantom fingers down his throat. He shoved past the flight attendant trying to get him to sit down and rushed to the bathroom in the back of the plane. He was completely off kilter, slamming into seats and pinballing his way down the aisle like he was drunk.

Jack didn’t even shut the door behind him, he just had to look at himself in a mirror, touching over his face, opening his mouth and trying to see down his throat. Jack pulled down the neck of his shirt and saw the vibrant bruises still there, but the pain, the fear he felt now was far less tangible. No bruises, but he had a sore throat, and his heart was beating a mile a minute.

_ I’m going crazy, I’m going fucking crazy _ he thought to himself.

“Sir!”

Jack blinked and slowly settled back into his skin, reality snapping into focus around him. He turned around to see a bunch of flight attendants all lined up and ready for a fight. Jack slowly raised his hands.

“I’m sorry,” he said, voice hoarse, “I... I have a fear of flying, had a nightmare...my apologies.”

Jack was led back to his seat and hoped they hadn’t notified the police. He hadn’t hurt anyone. The flight attendants eyed him suspiciously every time they walked by, and the people on the plane kept glancing back at him, but Jack just ignored them. It was out of his hands right now. If anything he was more exhausted than he’d been before falling asleep, but just the  _ thought _ of falling asleep filled him with dread.

It was like something was haunting him, like he’d picked up an angry spirit in Cairo and it was following him into his dreams to make him suffer. Jack was no stranger to nightmares, but these were  _ different _ . They were memories,  _ good _ memories, even... made horrifying. Leaving scars in the real world. His hand fluttered up to brush over his throat before he dropped it back into his lap.

Gabriel... it always came back to Gabriel for him.

Jack was awake for the rest of the flight, even if he was completely exhausted. He deplaned in Chicago and was grateful to see no cops waiting for him at the gate. Breaking out of jail would have been a hassle. Jack rented a car under a false name and hoped Ana was already there. Going home meant only one thing for him.

It was time to return to Bloomington.

Jack had made his midwestern roots no secret. Honestly, his marketing team had considered his farm-boy upbringing a boon for advertising and recruitment. Gabriel loved to tease him about being a hick, but he’d shut up the night they’d laid out under the stars as the corn whispered around them. Jack’s parents had still been alive at that point. He’d lost them nearly 20 years ago... far too young.

Jack had been to Bloomington with Gabriel three times. Once, during a break from SEP, then a vacation from Overwatch, and finally for his parents’ funerals. To lose both of them at once had been devastating, he probably wouldn’t have gotten through it without Gabriel by his side. Jack had returned alone once after that to settle some affairs and sell most of the land he knew he’d never be able to use. The farmhouse and about 5 acres though... those were his. 

The drive from Chicago seemed even longer than usual, the hover car driving so smoothly it nearly had him falling asleep at the wheel. Thankfully when his hands fell off the wheel, the car beeped at him to warn him to keep his hands on the wheel so the autodrive wouldn’t shut off. These new cars were aggressively safe. Besides, Jack wasn’t sure he wanted to sleep. He was...afraid of what might happen to him. Jack could run into gun fire without his heart skipping a beat, but the unknown, the encroaching darkness spreading over his mind like oil--that scared him.

The farmhouse was in a state of neglect when Jack pulled up into the driveway and stepped out. He held still for a moment, listening for anyone, but all he could hear was the wind whispering over the fields. Once upon a time this entire building had been surrounded by corn, but these days it was just five acres of weeds. Jack tromped up the rickety old steps onto the porch, on which the paint had long since peeled away. His parents dying so young had been an injustice, but some sick part of Jack was glad they weren’t here to see what he had become.

The old furniture had dust covers on it that Jack didn’t bother to remove; this was just a rendevouz for him and Ana to figure out where to go next, though it didn’t seem like she was here yet. Jack pulled out his pocket knife and scratched a marking into the dining room table before moving upstairs.

There were still a few dusty old pictures on the wall. The holopictures had long since died, their memories locked in clear glass for all time. But there were plenty of more traditional framed pictures. Pictures of Jack as a kid with one of his teeth missing, pictures of his parent’s wedding, pictures of-- Jack paused at the end of the hall and gently lifted the last picture up off the wall to wipe the dust away with the sleeve of his hoodie. It was him and Gabriel. He was grinning like a goddamn fool, one arm thrown over Gabriel’s shoulders as they stood before one of the cornfields. Gabriel had his arms crossed over his chest, but he was grinning at Jack. Not the camera.

Jack sucked in a shuddering breath and turned the frame over to pop the back out and pull the picture free. Jack could remember this picture being taken, could recall the smell of the fertilizer they used on their fields and how warm and solid Gabriel had been under his arm as he beamed at the camera his mom had been holding up. 

Jack took the photo with him as he pushed into his old bedroom. He’d have to get his bag out of the car, but for the moment he just pulled the plastic off his old bed and fell over the mattress. Jack stared at the photo for a moment and then set it aside onto a dusy bedside table. He was so sleep deprived he was starting to taste the exhaustion on his tongue.

Somehow he managed to force himself off the mattress, rubbing over his bruised throat to try and chase away the weight pulling down his eyelids. Jack swore he wouldn’t sleep until Ana arrived. He walked back out to the car to grab his bag, now that the property had been cleared, and brought it back up to his bedroom. That bed was calling his name... Jack ignored it, changing back into his leather jacket and strapping on his side arm and sliding a knife into his boot. Finally, he snapped on his mask. Jack felt slightly better with his kit on, ready to run or fight at the drop of a hat. Not that there seemed to be anyone or any _ thing _ around for miles. Jack paced around downstairs while he waited for Ana, but the hours passed and she never came.

Jack could just picture the look on her face if she saw him right now.

_ Really, Jack? _

She would ask wearily, perhaps behind a cup of tea.

_ You are going to drive yourself into an early grave being so high strung. _

Which was probably true. He was around the same age as his parents had been when they’d died. Jack just needed to finish his mission and then he could die. He’d welcome the goddamn rest. Jack finally gave up his pacing and rubbed his forehead above his mask, there was no way of knowing when Ana had left Egypt or how she was traveling. It could be days, or weeks, until they rendezvoused; he couldn’t stay awake that whole time.

Jack locked the front door, checked the locks on the back door and all the windows. It wasn’t that he thought the old-timey locks would protect him. It was just that anything breaking in would have to make  _ some _ noise, and that would wake him up. Of course, whatever had bruised his throat and choked him had hardly made any noise. Jack tried not to think about it; he still thought he might just be going crazy.

He needed Ana.

Jack stepped into his bedroom, glancing at the old photo before collapsing over the mattress, knocking his bag onto the floor. His pulse rifle clattered over the old wood and he sighed heavily, twisting to lean over the edge of the bed to pick it up. These days, it was the only thing he had in bed with him. 

He missed Gabriel. Like someone had chopped off one of his limbs and the wound was still open and throbbing. The years had not knit him together there; there were no scars. Jack was bleeding out and all he could do was try to staunch the flow. He knew that if anything was going to kill him it’d be this.

Jack thought it would take longer to fall asleep but between one breath and the next he was out, body too tired to stay awake a second longer.

_ “They say if you ever have a secret, you just need to tell the corn. Because corn... has ears! Get it? Get it, Gabe? Do you get the joke?” _

_ “I can’t believe I’ve kissed that mouth.” _

_ Jack laughed and grabbed Gabriel by the front of his hoodie to haul him in close, “You love this mouth.” _

_ “I love  _ you _ ,” Gabriel murmured, his arms wrapped around Jack, strong and oh so warm in the slightly chilly Fall breeze. “Even if you’re where humor goes to die.” _

_ “I think I’m funny,” said Jack, lightly punching Gabriel in the side. _

_ Gabriel reached up to gently brushed the back of his fingers along Jack’s cheek, “Oh Jackie,” he murmured, “it’s time to wake up.” _

_ “What?” _

_ “It’s time to wake up.” _

Jack’s eyes snapped open as the words whispered around him, and he could just  _ tell _ that he was no longer alone. He stayed completely still for a second, glancing around behind his visor but seeing nothing. Then all at once his head was grabbed, claws scratching against his mask as darkness rushed over him.

Jack yelled and went for his rifle, but it was nowhere near him. So he yanked his sidearm out of its holster on his thigh and tried to shoot at the weight over him. All at once it disappeared, but just as Jack was trying to roll off the bed he was pinned again, his gun knocked out of his hand to go skittering out of the room. Jack’s mask was ripped off and tossed away, and then his wrists were pinned beside his head. 

“Reaper,” Jack snarled, voice still hoarse from his strangling.

Gabriel bent over him with a dark laugh, white mask filling Jack’s vision. “Hello, Jack... home sweet home, eh?”

“Did you follow me from Cairo?” Jack asked, struggling fruitlessly to get out from under Gabriel’s pin.

“I’ve been with you the whole time,” Gabriel cooed, thighs squeezing around Jack’s hips as if mocking him for even trying to wiggle free. “You look angry even in your sleep. You know that, Jackie?”

“Go to hell!” Jack barked, slamming his head up against the mask.

Gabriel wrenched back, whether in surprise or pain Jack wasn’t sure. It was enough for him to arch up and shove Gabriel off him and he thumped onto the floor with a grunt. Jack made a break for the hallway. Before he could even get out of the room something wrapped around his ankle and yanked, sending him crashing to the floor. Jack clawed at the wood as he was dragged back, rolling over and kicking out only to have his other ankle grabbed by a clawed hand.

Gabriel was nothing more than looming darkness, his mask floating near the roof. Jack felt a jolt of fear. Was this a fucking dream? The pain in his face said otherwise but... this couldn’t be real. A tendril of darkness relaxed around his ankle just to slide up around his calf. More tendrils branched off and Jack found himself with his wrists pinned against his side and another wrapped around his throat to keep him flat against the floor.

“Tired of this song and dance,” Gabriel sighed, slowly forming back together, though his shadow still kept Jack pinned to the floor like a bug. “I  _ miss _ you, Jack.”

“Fuck you!” Jack spat, straining fruitlessly against the tendrils wrapped around him. They didn’t even budge and all he did was bruise his wrists.

Gabriel chuckled, a playful rumble of thunder, “Perhaps...” he reached up and slowly removed his mask. Jack braced for what he was about to see, unaware that he was holding his breath. Gabriel dropped his mask with a clatter then looked up, letting Jack see under the hood.

“Gabriel?” Jack breathed, stomach swooping as he looked into the warm brown eyes of his lover for the first time in years. Gabriel looked completely unchanged, and Jack had been prepared for almost any other horror, but not that. He seemed younger than the day they’d parted, more like he’d been in SEP and not how he’d been in Blackwatch.

Or was he?

The harder Jack looked, the more  _ off _ everything seemed. Gabriel’s teeth when he smiled... were there too many? Or were they too sharp? His eyes seemed too big for his face, just enough that Jack was uncomfortable meeting them, like they might swallow him up. His hair didn’t seem to obey the laws of gravity, or was there always just a small breeze blowing around him?

Jack blinked hard and turned his head away.

“You’re not my Gabriel.”

“Oh, but I am,” Gabriel murmured. The tendrils around his wrists yanked Jack’s arms over his head and Gabriel settled down on his hips and leaned over him, hands on either side of his head. “It’s me, Jackie. I still remember the first time we visited this house and we fucked in the barn.” Jack closed his eyes tightly, swallowing around a pathetic whimper. “We didn’t tell anyone else about that, did we? Our little secret, wasn’t it, Jackie?”

Jack nodded reluctantly, it was a memory he’d never shared with another person; but how could  _ this _ be his Gabriel? This was Reaper. A man wearing his lover’s face and using his lover’s memories... but not his lover. Jack ached at the thought; there was  _ nothing _ he wanted more than to have Gabriel back. Was it... so bad to think that maybe he could have his Gabriel back? They said it was impossible that Jack Morrison had survived the blast at Zurich, was this so impossible too?

He slowly opened his eyes only to see a face more familiar, Gabriel was gaunt with scars on his cheek and nose. Had Jack  _ imagined _ a younger face? This was Gabriel as he’d been the day they’d nearly died in the Zurich explosion.

“Am I going crazy?” Jack whispered, once more testing the hold of the tendrils around his aching wrists.

Gabriel smiled, lips pulling back and then  _ continuing _ to pull back until his cheeks split back to his ears. Jack struggled harder, crying out as a long black tongue unraveled from inside Gabriel’s mouth, drool dripping thickly from massive fangs that lined his mouth as it opened wide.

“Oh god, oh  _ fuck _ !” Jack strangled himself trying to escape as Gabriel bent down, that long tongue lapping from his jaw up to his temple. 

“You taste amazing, Jackie,” Gabriel whispered, though how he talked with that monstrosity of a mouth Jack didn’t want to know. He tried to look anywhere but at Gabriel, but a clawed hand grabbed him by the jaw and forced him to still,  _ forced _ him to stare. “You don’t find me attractive anymore?” As he spoke his teeth clicked together distractingly, there were fresh cuts lining Gabe’s cheeks and forehead, oozing smoke or blood or something Jack didn’t have a name for.

“Why are you doing this to me?” Jack sobbed.

“I just want us to be together again,” Gabriel’s voice was like smoke in Jack’s lungs, and each cut in his face opened up to show they were  _ eyes _ . Sclera black and pupils red as all of them focused right on Jack.

He jerked up, sheets tangling around him like he was being pinned. Jack cried out, stumbling out of bed until his back hit the wall, hands running over his face and chest, looking for wounds. He heard a crash and jerked away from the wall, glancing down to see he’d knocked down a photo.

“Jesus, Jack...”

Jack startled again, and then cried out in pain as he backed up onto the glass littering the floor.

“Oh my god, Jack!”

Gabriel was rushing at him and Jack panicked, turning to run for the door even as his feet bled thickly over the wood floor. Strong arms wrapped around him before he could get far, picking him up and carrying him out into the hallway as he struggled.

“Let me go, you monster!” he howled, trying to kick back.

“Stop...wiggling...” Gabriel grit out. “What’s gotten into you? You have a nightmare?” He set Jack down on the lid of the toilet and pinned him there with hands on his shoulders.

Jack was breathing so hard he was nearly hyperventilating. What the hell was going on? Slowly he noticed all the little details  _ around _ Gabriel, who was giving him a look of concern. The bathroom was clean but well-used. A pair of toothbrushes in a cup, a mirror over the sink that needed to be cleaned, a ruffled towel laying over the bar on the wall. The shower had a half-empty bottle of body wash in one corner.

This was the bathroom in his parent’s farmhouse but... not abandoned and neglected. Jack swallowed hard and finally focused on Gabriel as he slowly kneeled down before him, “Hey, you back with me, baby?” Gabriel asked softly, one hand resting on Jack’s knee.

“I don’t...understand,” Jack said weakly. “Where... why are we... you...”

“Hold still,” said Gabriel gently, gripping Jack’s ankle, “why don’t you talk to me while I get your feet taken care of?”

Jack took several deep breaths, rubbing his hands over his face. Was this another dream? All his other dreams had been memories, and this felt so  _ real _ . The pain in his feet, the cool porcelain under his thighs. He was only wearing a pair of boxers and a t-shirt and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d dressed down for sleep. Gabriel was carefully picking glass out of his feet with a pair of tweezers and Jack just stared at him.

He looked older, there was a little white and grey striped through his impeccably groomed facial hair and he had some new wrinkles at the corners of his eyes and mouth. He kept looking up at Jack, clearly worried about him.

“I... had a nightmare,” Jack said slowly, uncertainly. He kept expecting Gabriel’s face to break open into a gnashing maw of fangs and bile but he just frowned harder and rubbed one hand over Jack’s calf, encouraging him to keep talking. “You... you were a monster,” Jack choked out, still remembering it all clear as day, “with fangs and... too many eyes. You pinned me to the floor and-”

“Shh, it was a dream,” Gabriel whispered, grabbing the nearby bandages to wrap Jack’s feet up after they’d been cleaned up. “I love you, Jackie, I’d never hurt you.”

“Right... why are we in my parent’s house?” Jack asked, letting Gabriel help him to his feet so he could limp back into the bedroom.

“Oh boy... that nightmare must have really done a number on you... maybe we should see a doctor,” said Gabriel as he had Jack lay back in bed while he went about cleaning up the glass.

“No! No doctors,” said Jack quickly, “I just... I don’t remember...”

Gabriel came back over holding the picture Jack had knocked off the wall and handed it to him, “You don’t remember this?”

Jack took the photo with shaking hands, choking up as he saw it was him and Gabriel on their wedding day. Jack in a white tux and Gabriel looking striking in a black one. “We’re married?”

Gabriel held up his hand to show the simple golden band on his finger and then took Jack’s hand to show him he had a matching one. “Baby... are you sure you don’t want to see a doctor?”

This tenderness hurt almost as much as the feeling of being choked or strangled. He teared up and covered his face with his hands, ashamed and scared and completely off kilter. What was real and what was a dream? Jack couldn’t tell anymore. Gabriel’s warm arms wrapped him up in a loving hug, rocking him gently.

“I would  _ never _ hurt you, Jackie. I love you so much. When we got to retire from Overwatch and get married it was the happiest day of my life, and I  _ swore _ I’d spend the time we have left by your side. I meant that. I don’t know what’s going on right now but we’re going to get through it. Together.”

“Oh my  _ god _ ,” Jack choked out, resting his forehead against Gabriel’s shoulder, tears dripping onto his skin. “You were a  _ monster _ , Gabe... you were  _ hurting _ me... we were trying to k-kill each other or something.”

“It was a nightmare,” Gabriel soothed, brushing his fingers through Jack’s hair. “That’s all... and if I suddenly sprouted fangs or claws or some extra eyes it wouldn’t change how much I adore you.”

Jack sniffed and rubbed his face against Gabriel’s shoulder, “This is real? Really real?”

“Yes, it’s real... what kind of dream has you walking over broken glass?” Gabriel reached down to prod one of his feet and Jack hissed, jerking it away. “See? It hurts, and you didn’t wake up... so it’s real.”

“It’s  _ real _ ... we’re married and we... we live in my parent’s old house,” Jack whispered. “We retired from Overwatch... it didn’t collapse?”

“ _ No _ ! Jesus, was that in your dream too?”

“I... I thought...” Jack pulled back, rubbing the heels of his palms against his eyes until he saw stars. He took several deep breaths and then finally lowered his hands to look Gabriel in his face. “I love you,” he blurt out. Gabriel’s smile was like the sun breaking through the clouds, it nearly made Jack cry again. Why? All that other stuff wasn’t true...he could barely remember half of it anyway.

This was his reality.

“I love you too, Jackie..” Gabriel cupped his face and pulled him into a soft kiss.

Jack groggily opened his eyes, seeing double before he focused enough to see the undulating mass writhing directly over him. It was bulbous black flesh, smoke, fangs, eyes and claws all mixed together. It nearly made him sick to look at. He cringed back, trying to scramble away only to find he was still pinned against the dusty floor.

“We could be happy together, Jack, if you just stop fighting me.”

Jack couldn’t tell how this... thing... was talking to him. It had no mouth. Or many mouths. Its form was changing constantly. How could this be Gabriel?

“Let me go,” he grit out, voice hoarse from where the tendril was still wrapped tightly over his neck. “Just... stop this...”

“You did this to me, Jack...” the thing whispered as it shivered above him and then took on the form of Gabriel, though he had yellowing fangs lining his cheekbones and a few eyes blinking out from his long black tongue when it slid out of his mouth. “You stood by and watched as I died.”   
  
“ _ No _ !” Jack yelled, trying to lean away as that tongue ran over his cheek and he could feel not just spit but each slimy eyeball running over his skin.

“I still love you, Jack... and you don’t love me simply because I’m  _ this _ ? Because I’m what  _ you _ made me? I’m  _ hurt _ .”

“ _ Choose _ , Jackie. Choose--”

Jack closed his eyes tightly. Choose  _ what _ ?

“Jackie... waffles or pancakes? You have to choose.”

Jack opened his eyes to see Gabriel giving him a concerned look. They were still in bed, Jack resting in Gabriel’s lap with his feet stinging and bandaged up. What... had just happened to him?

“Okay, this is freaking me out,” said Gabriel, standing up with Jack still in his arms, he’d always been so strong. “We’re taking you to see a doctor.”

“No! No no no,” Jack struggled until Gabriel sat him back down on the bed. “I don’t want to go to a doctor.”

“You’re so fucking stubborn,” Gabriel said, clearly frustrated. “There’s obviously something wrong! You think I can just stand back and watch... whatever is going on?”

“I’m sorry,” Jack breathed, pressing his fingers into his temple, he could feel a headache starting up behind his left eye. “I don’t know... what’s going on.”

“Baby,” Gabriel implored, “please, let’s just see a doctor. I’m worried about you.”

Jack was worried about himself too, he couldn’t tell which was reality. A monster laying over him or this caring and concerned Gabriel. His husband who loved him.

“Oh Jackie,” Gabriel sighed, “you have to choose.”

Jack jerked to see fangs dripping over his face, spit sliding down his cheek. He sobbed in frustration, what was  _ happening _ to him? “Stop stop stop stop,” he begged.

“It’s me, Jackie,” Gabriel whispered above him, like a dark cloud filling the room, his tendrils now crawling over every inch of him like maggots. “We could be happy together if you just relax. No more fighting, no more pain... just you and me, forever. Don’t you want that?”

Jack felt tears spill from his eyes as he looked at the ever-changing form of Gabriel. The monster. Gabriel.  _ Monster _ .  _ Gabriel _ . He couldn’t tell the difference, he couldn’t tell what was real. He was tired and in pain, he could still feel the cuts on his feet and the pressure of bandages wrapped tightly around him. Everything was blending together. One moment it was all fangs and eyes and the next moment Gabriel was gently slapping his cheek, voice coming from far away.

“Jack? Stay with me, Jack. Stay here. Don’t leave me. We’re so happy. We could keep being so happy.”

There was a war on, people were in danger. Ana was coming to meet him...

“We need to get you to a doctor.”

“Stay with me, Jackie. Stop fighting me...”

Jack stared up to see Gabriel staring down at him, his eyes were just black holes in his face. He had a massive snarling snout, his tongue hanging out like he was a panting dog. He couldn’t do this anymore... he just wanted his Gabriel back. That was all he’d ever wanted since the day they’d been torn apart. Jack leaned up, found the tendrils had released him though he didn’t know when. He gently cupped Gabriel’s fleshy snout and pressed a lingering kiss against the fangs and torn lips, tasting blood and bile on his tongue as Gabriel took it deeper. His tongue was licking into Jack’s mouth, getting deeper and deeper.

Monster or man... maybe he had finally lost his mind but Jack just wanted to sleep again. In a warm bed with a man who loved him. Darkness was swirling around him as Gabriel’s long tongue slipped down his throat, cutting off his air, but he wasn’t struggling this time. He closed his eyes and fell into the void.


End file.
